About Me
Monday, July 2, 2007
if you shouldn't roll doughnuts down a hill then why are they round?
My mommy said that i HAVE to go to college, and if i don't she will SHUN me for life and not send birthday money to the grandkids she is never going to have. She said i could major in "ART" or "PHILOSOPHY" but i said that i will major in "GETTING A COOL JOB" because i want to have a cool job and if i am going to spend $80,000 on college i better damn well get a cool job. Come to think of it, i better get a fucking awesome job for that kind of dough! There are other things that i want to major in, but they do not have classes for Hoboken, Mooch, Ladies man, or Criminal. I also said that i could get a job throwing things, which i am pretty good at. And if i threw deadly things, people would just give me money. The same way muggers and thiefs get paid. Also, if i had a criminalistic job i could get paid in weed < that is probably one of the best ways to get your paycheck; But if she doesn't like that i'm not going to college then i'll lob a toaster oven at her.
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2 comments:
if your mom wants grandchildren...then why does she have such a problem with you hanging out with me and "knocking me up"? Go for the cool job. be a police officer or a space cowboy or something...because no offense but...i was in your art class...just...go for the cool job :)
she wants grandkids, but not yet i don't think. Plus she wants to meet all my friends and have them over to the house so she can feel like she has some sort of control over my life. But we both know she has about as much control over my life as a vagina has teeth.
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